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  “Girl, you gonna drain me dry.” He laughed. “But give me an hour to recharge and I got you. Trust me.” He stated. He held out his arm and I slid over to lie on his chest and shut my eyes.

  It was like I was trying to freeze this moment in time. Suddenly I wasn’t concerned about him wanting another woman. Shit, he couldn’t even handle me. Yeah, we were going to have the best marriage ever. I could already see it.

  ****

  THE NEXT MORNING

  Horny as ever when I woke up, I rolled over in our King-sized bed to the sounds of the ocean waves crashing onto the beach. I tried to curl up under Bronco before waking him for round two before breakfast. But when I got over to his side of the bed, it was cool. He wasn’t there.

  I opened my eyes and looked around the room. “Bronco,” I called out for him assuming he was in the bathroom. No answer. “Bae, don’t try to hide from me.” I said playfully. “I’ma get at that again for sure.”

  I climbed out of the bed, my feet slapped on the cold marble floor. I was still butt naked from our all night love making sessions and saw no use for clothes. Besides, we were in Mexico. Still searching, I walked around our suite and before long noticed that his wallet and key card were gone. “Maybe he went down to eat without me.” I said to myself. Besides, Mexico was gorgeous so I couldn’t blame him.

  I decided to go down and join him. It was a beautiful day out and I needed to soak up some of this sun before life got back to normal at home. But before that I needed to wash my ass. I’m sure nobody wanted to be sitting across from a big cum bucket at breakfast.

  ****

  When I got down to the buffet, I scanned the room looking for Bronco. I didn’t see him anywhere in the room and things weren’t making sense. Maybe he ate and was already on the beach. I thought. He loved swimming in the ocean so I’m sure he was out there somewhere I just had to find him. I wished he was courteous enough to have left me a note, but whatever.

  Although I was starving, before I grabbed any food, I wanted to find him. I walked out the dining room area and onto the pool deck. It was about 10:00 o’clock in the morning but there were quite a few people out enjoying the pool. As I rounded the corner I saw a man across the deck in the hot tub that looked like Bronco from behind. The sun was so bright that even with my MCM shades on, I couldn’t get a good look. Especially since the guy had his back toward me.

  When I got closer, and walked around I saw that it was Bronco soaking in the Jacuzzi. He had his arms outstretched across the tub with his head leaned back. My nigga was so damn fine and I took a second to admire the view before alerting him I was there. His honey brown skin was now sun kissed and all his tattoo’s seemed to come alive across is back. He looked so relaxed.

  I decided to creep up to surprise him.

  “Heyyyyy husband…the fuck!” I shouted as I walked up and saw some random bitch with his dick in her mouth. She pulled back in shock when she saw the heat in my face and wiped the corners of her lips. “What…what…what’s going on?” It felt like the breath had been kicked out of me with a boot.

  “Tae! What the fuck you doing out here?” He had the nerve to ask me like I was the one out there getting topped off. “Why you ain’t…I’m saying…I was gonna come get you later!”

  “What?” I yelled still in shock holding my chest.

  “You heard me,” he yelled scrambling out of the Jacuzzi. Walking toward his trunks he grabbed them off a lawn chair and reached for his towel. The woman snatched her towel off the deck, slithered out and scurried off like the whore she was.

  “I…I can’t believe you did this to me! I can’t believe…after everything you…you doing this!” I looked around and saw that a lot of people watched our little movie unfold. I was so embarrassed and realized I was being made a fool of so with my heart broken I stormed off.

  ****

  “The fuck was you doing creeping up on me?” Bronco asked as he walked into our hotel room. He tossed the wet towel on the floor and stomped up to me. “Trying to be sneaky and shit.” He said through clenched teeth.

  Was I having a nightmare? He gets caught cheating and he goes off on me? “How can you ask me some shit like that?” I yelled in tears. “I woke up and you were gone, Bronco! I came downstairs to join you thinking you were eating. I ain’t know you’d be all out in the open fucking some skank!”

  “What you tripping for? I mean, don’t act like you wasn’t hip. What the fuck you think I was talking about outside the church? Huh?” He asked. “See, I knew you couldn’t handle this shit. Can’t believe I went through with it. Something told me not to marry you and I did it anyway.” He shot back. Every word he yelled felt like daggers into my heart. But he was doing the most. So I had to gather his things.

  “Bronco, I remember everything you said. You specifically told me if I agreed it would be us together. Not you by yourself without my knowledge. Those were your rules not mine. And already you breaking them and blaming me! How could you?” I threw his own words back into his face.

  He looked puzzled and stuck. “You know what…this shit dumb.” He scratched his head. “I ain’t ‘bout to sit up in here arguing with you. If you can’t handle me getting a ‘lil head on vacay out the country, how the hell you gonna handle this marriage? If anything that was a test and guess what? You failed!” He said before he grabbed his key card again and walked back out the door.

  “What have I set myself up for?” I said as I flopped down onto the bed and cried into my hands. I grew up with a mother and father who were still in love to this day. Them being together and happy were the only pictures I ever had of marriage but mine looks nothing like theirs. Bronco is so hateful and angry that it makes me wonder if his purpose in life is to break me down, not love me.

  Dear, God! What was I gonna do?

  CHAPTER THREE

  TAE

  This was the kind of thing that bothered me to no end, even though I know it’s the least of my problems. I mean, why does he not dry the floor after he stepped out of the shower, dripping wet? Now my socks are soaked and…

  What was I talking about? Really the only thing that was on my mind was that Bronco and me hadn’t spoken since we left Mexico and I was worried beyond all worry that he would leave me. And although my head said it could be a good thing, I couldn’t see it.

  Taking a deep breath I removed my wet socks and tossed them into the hamper. Now back home in our apartment in Hyattsville Maryland and all I had to show for our vacation was a broken heart. Normally, Bronco not speaking to me for a few days wouldn’t bother me so bad. I would just make his favorite meal and everything would be cool but now I didn’t know what to do.

  Since it was my off day and Bronco was at work, I asked my BEST, Stacy, to swing by and chill with me. She usually knew what to say to get me in a better mood and we had so much to catch up on. To be honest we hadn’t really rapped since my wedding and I had a lot to fill her in about.

  Part of me was nervous about telling her everything. I mean, I know how Bronco and my situation looked to me so saying it out loud to someone else would be crazy. I couldn’t even wrap my mind around the fact that I had given him the okay to be with other women. On the other hand, Stacy was my BITCH so I must keep it one hundred with her. Plus I needed to get this shit off my chest or I was sure I was gonna die.

  ****

  “So, love, how was Mexico?” Stacy asked me. She was a big pretty girl with dark skin and red locs. She was sitting on my couch with me drinking her favorite cocktail, Hennessy with a shot of Hennessy.

  “Mmmmmm, girl it was beautiful,” I said as I faked a smile. “I mean the weather was gorgeous every day we were there and the water was ice blue and warm. Oh, and the people were so sweet. I could have stayed forever.” I explained. “Have you ever been?”

  “Chile, bye, you know I can’t leave the country.” She confessed. “Not the way my parole is set up.” She laughed. “But I’m glad you had a good time. Because let’s be clear, this means fo
r better or worse. Ain’t no turning around now.”

  “Well, when you can, honey, I suggest you get a passport and go,” I said ignoring her little remark about my marriage. “It is truly a must see.” I continued.

  She looked at me suspiciously. “Yeah…Yeah…Yeah, but I’m surprised you saw anybody’s ocean. Because, if I know you, ya’ll was all over each other the whole time.” She said sarcastically.

  “Yeah, something like that.” A picture of him getting his dick sucked in the Jacuzzi ran through my mind.

  “But truth be told, I’m shocked ya’ll even made it to Mexico, honey. The way you was standing up at that alter by yourself sweating. Ohhhh, I felt so bad for my girl.” She shuddered. “My heart was palpitating so fiercely. You don’t know how happy I was seeing ya’ll two walk back into that church together, I’m trying to tell you.” She stated. “It wasn’t just me either.”

  “Yeah, the whole clapping when we came back in made shit more awkward but I was just happy we were together.” I sat quietly and debated whether to spill my tea or not.

  She sipped her drink. I watched how she took another huge gulp and placed the glass back down on the table. The glass looked so tiny in her large hand. Let me give you a little background so I can get my mind off my own shit for a moment. Stacy was ‘Trans’, although it was hard to tell upon first glance.

  She was beautiful, but shit, she was always beautiful. Even as a boy. We grew up together and she was always her own person, something I wished I could be. That’s what I loved most about her. But about five years ago, she fell deep into depression. And in order to pull herself out, she decided to be honest about who she was and live her best life. That’s when she threw the whole boy away and my best friend Stanley became my best friend Stacy.

  That shit took so much courage to do. I really did admire her bravery and I hoped that one day, if need be, I would have it in me to be just as brave.

  “Helllloooo…” Stacy yelled snapping her fingers. “Come back, baby. The plane done landed. We not in Mexico anymore.” She joked.

  I chuckled.

  “So, tell me…how was the husband dick, girl?” She asked. “I mean was it the same as boyfriend dick? What, chile…Do speak! The suspense is killing me over here!”

  “Well, when we first got there it was non-stop sex.” I cleared my throat. “But, then we got into a fight. A bad one.” I confessed.

  “What? Why?” She inquired.

  “’Cuz I found him in the hot tub getting his dick sucked by another bitch.” I admitted reluctantly.

  “Shut…the…fuck…up!” She roared. “You have gotta be kidding me! On your honeymoon?” She asked.

  “I sooo wish I was playing but I’m not.” I could feel myself about to cry and tried my best to calm down. “Nope, I caught him, on day two of our trip. And to make matters worse he didn’t even care, Stacy. He just…he was just so mean.”

  “Oh, soooo when are we having the divorce party?” She asked me seriously. “Because it’s one thing to stall on your wedding day but now he adding a second bitch on your honeymoon too?”

  “I don’t want to divorce him, Stac!” I confessed. “Plus, I have to tell you something else that may make all of this make sense.” I wiped the tears that crept down my face. “You may…you may give me some other advice on what I can do to keep him.”

  She bugged her eyes out and stared at me intensely waiting for my confession. “What you can do to keep him? Have you officially lost your mind? Is that man knocking you in the head or something?”

  “Just listen, please.” I took a deep breath. “On the day of my wedding, when I went out to find Bronco, he was sitting outside. He told me he couldn’t marry me unless I agreed that we would bring women into our bed.” I said as I looked down at my feet then back up at her.

  She covered her mouth. “Oh my fucking God!” She said through her fingers. “I can’t believe what I’m hearing. You…you gave him a pass for some additional ass?”

  I nodded my head.

  “Taevonne Alexus Colby…Why would you go into a marriage that started off with a stipulation like that?” She asked standing up in front of me. “What on earth is wrong with you? Because I know Mr. and Mrs. Colby didn’t raise you on stupid.”

  “I ain’t have no choice.” I said looking up at her. “He wasn’t going to marry me and I…I need him.”

  “Why didn’t you refuse? Why didn’t you give him an ultimatum? I mean did he hold a gun to your head too?” She asked.

  “Yeah, kinda. At least that’s how it felt in my mind. I mean what else was I supposed to do, not get married? I had a church full of people who were ready to put my embarrassment on Snap.” I said. “And I…I love him.”

  She looked down at me and shook her head slowly from left to right. “That’s exactly what the fuck you do! Of course people would have been shady, that’s what they do, but at least you could have your self-dignity about you. Now look. It hadn’t even been a week and already the man stepped outside of your marriage.”

  I knew she was right but suddenly I grew angry. “I got my dignity! I didn’t tell you my truth so you could come in here and make me feel bad about my decision.” I shouted feeling slightly embarrassed that I even opened my mouth.

  “Trick, you told me because you knew I would give it to you raw.” She pointed at me with her long blue nail. “And you told me because deep in that brain of yours you know I’m right.” She boasted.

  Fuck that! She ain’t my mother. “You know what, I’ma need you to bounce.” I told her standing up, crossing my arms over my chest. “I don’t have time to sit here and be looked down on for marrying the man I love.” I continued. “This is between me and him.”

  “Honey, if he was a real man who truly loved you, he would have never pulled up on you with that bullshit.” She reached down and yanked her purse off the couch and threw it over her shoulder.

  “Bye, Stacy.” I said firmly before I stomped to my front door. I opened it up and waited for her to walk through it. “You said what you had to say and I don’t need to hear nothing else.”

  She laughed as she bent down and picked up her drink. She dropped the rest back and put the glass down on the table then walked up to the door. Instead of walking right out she stopped and turned toward me. With another long finger pointed in my face she said, “When my real best friend comes back to her senses, tell her to text me.” She told me as she sauntered out the door and I slammed it behind her.

  CHAPTER FOUR

  TAE

  I really wished I could have called out today and not gotten in trouble for it. I wasn’t in the mood to be here and since I worked at a fried chicken fast food restaurant, where I was an assistant manager, it meant all I’m gonna get is trouble. But today, we were short staffed so I gotta be everybody. And it started with taking orders at the register.

  “Welcome to When You Can’t We Chick-Can, how can I serve you?” I asked a couple who stood in front of me.

  “Ummm, let me get a 3 piece with an extra biscuit and what you want baby?” The guy asked the girl.

  She looked at the sign over my head like she hadn’t been here a million times already this week. “Can I have a grilled chicken salad with vinaigrette dressing and a diet coke.” She looked at me.

  He smiled at her and put his arm around her waist like she was really the one. They looked like they were so much in love. It’s not too often you see public affection these days. They gotta be new. Puppy love. Bronco and me used to be just like them. Part of me wanted to pull her to the side and say, “Girl, don’t let him pull you in no freak shit like my husband tried with me.” But I decided to mind my own business.

  “Ok, that’ll be $11.11.” I told them snapping out of my daydream.